| ok so does anyone know how to just delete this thing cuz i never use it and i'm sick of it???????? |
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| Yesterday I was so excited because I went to petition for a restricted license (can only drive to and from work and school) and they gave me a full unrestricted license. I can reinstate my license by going down to the DMV and showing proof of insurance. So I get online to get insurance quotes only to find out after 3 pages of questions that you have to be 18 just to get a quote. It seems like I've been cursed not to drive since I turned 16. Who else can seriously say that they have gotten 6 speeding tickets in 6 months after they turn 16?
I don't know whether to just wait till I'm 18 in two months and try then or pay an arm and a leg if my dads insurance will even cover me.
Oh well Happy St. Patricks Day. |
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| what can you do when you feel like life itself is falling apart? lately it seems like everyone and everything i once had through the tough times is gone now. its like i'm just wandering day to day lost and alone.
after everything that has happened it gets to the point that i'm scared and almost terrified to see anyone from my past. not really unfounded either.... each time i see certain ppl from sheridan something happens to my car right in front of my house and i'm not sure if its a coincidence or not yet. i'm really just scared that something like last january is going to happen again. i can't wait til may when i leave and then maybe i can relax at night and feel ok to leave my car in front of my own damn house.
i'm so fucking sick of being scared. scared to sleep, scared to go out and have fun, hell i even freak out when ppl touch me if i'm not expecting it. damn i'm only 17 and there is no reason i should have had to go through as much as i have. then when ppl i care about see how screwed up i am on the inside they leave and want nothing to do with me. i've had ppl come into work that i positively terrified of and have had to serve them and be pleasant because my coworkers are so damn lazy and won't pick up one table. then after they leave i sit in the back til i can stop shaking and crying. and then there's the few individuals that tell me i bring shit like that on myself!
now really who asks for shit like that in life? i never did, i just want to live my life as best as i can. why was i chosen to go through all of this? and i know it happens to others and i'm not the only one, but why so much all at once?
i guess it all kinda comes down to fate, faith or day-by-day |
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| "For What It's Worth"
I'm taking it in
I'm holding it back
I'm filling my lungs with the knife in my back
But you kept going on just to make me feel like this
Now that it's over
I won't feel the same
A broken frame with our picture is wasted
I've thrown it away
Losing sight
You were all I had (all I can take...)
I guess the jokes on me
We missed our chance
I won't forget
As time will only tell where to go
(Time will only tell where you go)
Though I wish that you weren't breathing
I still just can't believe
You're gone...
And I was looking for something
But I came up with nothing
Not a reason to leave or let this out
But you kept going on
Just to make me feel like this
Now that it's over
I won't feel the same
A broken friendship was worth it
I'll scrap any thoughts with your name
Still I long for you to stay
I take back anything
We missed our chance
I won't forget
As time will only tell where to go
(Time will only tell where you go)
Though I wish that you weren't breathing
I still just can't believe
You're gone...
We missed our chance
I won't forget
As time will only tell where to go
(Time will only tell where you go)
Though I wish that you weren't breathing
I still just can't believe
You're gone...
We missed our chance
I won't forget
As time will only tell where to go
(Time will only tell where you go)
Though I wish that you weren't breathing
I still just can't believe
You're gone...
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| i really don't know how to handle this.... jess went to idaho on really short notice and she'll be gone through christmas and i don't know if she'll be back in time for new years. i found some1 i actually want to spend the holidays with and now she is gone for them. i am not ok with this!
the boys know that its hard to have her gone and are trying to be extra nice, but its not the same. and as for the person that once said that the reason i run into so much trouble is because i hang out with the older guys is wrong. every time something bad has happened its because of guys my age that don't know how to take no for an answer. the older ones treat me like a little sister and try to keep me safe if i make a bad choice.
there's my venting for the day....
"you wrecked my life, now i'll have to drive all night." |
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